Lately, my son has become glued to my hip. I'm not able to leave the room without him getting upset or without him two steps behind me. I love that he is attached to me and that he needs and wants his mama. But all of this has been really worried about who will watch him when I go into labour.
I am so worried about this it's all I think about. Hubby's sister has graciously said she would watch him but she lives almost an hour away and I don't feel comfortable with him being that far away from me. I want him close and I want to be able to see him in a matter of minutes if I want. As much as he's attached to me, I'm attached to him. He's my baby and always will be.
My mom suggested my aunt and I know she would be great with him. She has everything he would need like toys, a highchair, and crib (I'm hoping he'll be sleeping in a big boy bed by then but it may not happen). My aunt would also be able to entertain J by taking him to visit their horses. My only concern is she is someone Joshua sees only a handful of times a year. It makes me so sad to think of us dropping Joshua off somewhere and him being frightened or scared and crying for us.
What I'm really hoping for is that hubby's mom will not go on the road with hubby's dad (he's a long haul truck driver) and stay home when it comes close to the due date. Then she could come and stay at our house with J where he is most comfortable and familiar. I don't want him to associate the baby coming home with a bad experience beforehand.
The most perfect solution would be having my mom watch J, but she will be in the delivery room with us and I don't want to take that away from her. Watching a birth is like nothing you'll ever see and it's a wonderful experience.
It could be my pregnancy hormones making things 100 times worse, but I'm so sad every time I think about the plan for J.