The hCG Rollercoaster

Before IVF, I never thought twice about hCG and before I had my embryo transfer, I was never worried about it. It's funny how the mind can fixate on one thing and become almost obsessed with it.

For the first week of my two week waiting period, I didn't think much about the transfer and if I was pregnant, but as soon as day 8 rolled around, I was anxious. I wanted to know and I did something I probably shouldn't have done. I took a pregnancy test and to my disappointment, it was negative. Two days later I tortured myself again and took another one only to have the same results.

When I went for my bloodwork after the two week wait, I was expecting to receive a call to tell me I wasn't pregnant. I wasn't prepared for the nurse to tell me that I was technically pregnant since my hCG level was 11. I was informed it was extremely low and I was more than likely having a chemical pregnancy. 2 days later I went for more bloodwork and my hCG went up to 18. I couldn't help but be a little excited and that's when I turned to other bloggers and fertility groups for support. I had never heard of the hCG roller coaster before and it's a tough ride to be on. Reading about other women's roller coaster ride was heartbreaking, but it helped put things into perspective for me. A week later I went for a third blood test and again, my hCG level had gone up again to 28. I knew what the end result would be so at this point I was praying that my body would do what it had to do with this chemical pregnancy so I would not have to take any pills to make the miscarriage happen (which I have thought long and hard about and don't think I would...I would always hold on to the smaller hope that the doctor is wrong). The following week I went for more blood work and this time the level had dropped to 15.

My hCG roller coaster ride was coming to a halt and I was relieved. Relieved my body was doing what it had to do. Relieved that I wouldn't be getting my hopes up anymore for disappointment. Relieved that this wouldn't delay my next transfer any longer.

So now I'm anxiously patiently waiting for my next transfer. I have to wait two menstrual cycles...I've already had one and I'm looking forward to day 1 of my next one (I really thought I would NEVER say something like that in my life, but it could mean the start of a pregnancy).