8 Days Post Transfer and Still Just as Anxious

It seems like I have a new routine in the morning...get up and go pee on a stick, or in my case, pee in a cup and add 4 drops of urine to the test. I panicked this morning taking the test because I didn't think the pink line was going to appear...this thought even woke me up in the night. But after about 2 minutes, it showed up. And then I started to wonder if it looked more faint then before. 

All of this worrying is ridiculous. I wouldn't think women who have a "regular" (by regular, I mean don't need IVF to conceive) don't worry this much. 

I've been asking to God to take all of my worries away. I want this to be an enjoyable time...I don't want to constantly be worrying about it. I was more relaxed when I went to sleep last night...God is definitely working in me. 

I called my nurse yesterday to see if I could move up my beta test and she said I could go on Monday as long as I didn't mind going again in 48 hours if the beta number was not high enough to satisfy the doctors. Of course I agreed. I thought it was standard to always have a second beta to make sure the numbers were doubling over 48 hours but at the fertility clinic I go to they only take one beta and then schedule an ultrasound a few weeks later. 

Thinking about all of this stresses me...really, everything is out of my control. This pregnancy is in God's hands and I need to let go of my worry and trust Him completely. 

Here's the breakdown of what our blastocyst (baby) is hopefully doing:

- 1dpt:   Blastocyst hatches out of shell

- 2dpt:   Blastocyst attaches to a site on the uterine lining

- 3dpt:   Implantation begins as the blastocyst begins to bury in the lining

- 4dpt:   Implantation process continues and morula buries deeper in the lining

- 5dpt:   Implantation is complete, cells that will become the placenta and fetus have begun to develop

- 6dpt:   hCG starts to enter the bloodstream 

- 7dpt:   Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted

- 8dpt:   Fetal development continues and hCG continues to be secreted

- 9dpt:   hCG levels are high enough to detect a pregnancy