Wednesday, 1 June 2016

The End from the Beginning

I have been struggling to write this post for days, 8 days to be exact.

Finn, my precious baby, was called to Heaven. Finn's parents told me the news 8 days ago. I was so ill prepared to hear this news. I just kept rereading the words over and over and over again, almost as if I couldn't comprehend them and if I read them just one more time, it would make sense, but it never did. Time just sort of stopped for me in that moment, when my eyes began to water and I couldn't read the words anymore. I replayed all of the events in Finn's life and just couldn't get the beginning to add up to the end. In that moment, a piece of my heart broke to be with Finn. Just because Finn was adopted by another family does not mean that I loved my baby any less. If anything, it means I loved Finn so much that I wanted what was best for him, and unfortunately, I was not able to give him that. But Finn's parents, they were and they did. To quote Finn's mom "I would do it again in a minute even if I knew the outcome from the beginning." That is powerful.

Finn fought to stay. Finn's mom received a positive pregnancy test which is proof that he fought. But God has a plan mapped out for all of us and Finn was called to Heaven. One day, we will all meet again. And one day, my arms will be full.

As for Finn's precious life, I believe there is purpose in his life, his precious life. Though it may have been short, I hope Finn's story can give hope to other families.

Because of Finn, I now know a wonderful family who shares the same values as I do and I have the honour of calling Finn's mom my friend, a friend I will cherish.


  1. So sorry to hear of your loss. Prayers during this time and in the times ahead.

    1. Thank you, Amie, the prayers are very appreciated.